Hella Hold'em

DMB sure sings a sexy song about the end of the world, but as I drove home from the casino last night, the lightning show was so fantastic that I wondered if the world was ending and nobody told me.

I had the absolute best time playing poker last night. If only every trip to Majestic could be so wonderful. It's always nice to walk away a winner, but on top of that, my table was absolutely off the hook hysterical. Every once in a blue moon, the chemistry between the players at the table is just dead on. For once, I was sitting at the table that everyone wanted to be at - you know, the one with railbirds watching just to see why these people were having so much fun.

The day didn't start out so jovial. For the first couple hours, I was knee deep in quicksand. I was seeing playable hands, but redraws were killing me and I ditched a lot of hands on the turn - only after being the aggressor to that point. I was down a buy in pretty quick, but there was a LOT of money on the table and the guys were pushing it around with free abandon - definitely not protecting their stacks. I wanted me some!

To my dismay, the 3 big stacks at the table got up and left in short order, leaving a bunch of measly $100-ish stacks (rocks, no less). Oy vey. After an orbit or so, we got some new blood, and that is when the fun began.

My first surge was with QQ. I made it 12 to go from UTG+1 (1/2 blinds) and got 3 callers (d'oh! That didn't work!) As soon as the dealer noted, "4 players..." I immediately began the chant in my head: queen! queen! queen! And what to my wondering eyes should appear? A flop of K-Q-x. I doubled through one of the rocks, who quickly took to the streets.

Alrighty... back to even.

My next influx of chips came courtesy of the cute guy in the 10 seat. He was polite and funny to boot - but probably way too young for me. Late college age maybe? Mid-20's? I dunno. I'm awful at guessing ages. Anyhow, I was one off the button and limped with 6-7 of spades. One of the blinds raised it to 10, and with 2 callers after him, I called the extra 8. The flop came 4c-5c-x. Cutie bet 15 into the pot of 40. Hmmm... I needed one caller ahead of me to chase. Got one. 70 in the pot and 15 to me. Call. Turn gave me the spade draw. Cutie bet 20. All I could think was, "Boy, you are not betting enough to get me off this draw!" Other guy folded. 20 to me into a pot of 105. Sorry, buddy - you're giving me over 5:1 and I'm open ended with the flush draw. I called. Rivered the flush. Cutie bet 20 and I raised him (can't remember how much - probably to 50). He called. I showed. He mucked.

He mentioned the hand a few times over the course of the evening, and feeling bad for the guy, I eventually explained why I chased. He seemed like a decent player but not really a student of the game. The table was already on to me that I knew what I was doing, so I didn't feel like I was giving away information by showing that I understand pot odds. The table was so busy whooping it up that I'm sure nobody noticed anyway. Cutie seemed quite thoughtful after my explanation. I hope it helps him out someday.

I had a lovely chip stack at this point, chip leader for certain. That's when the fun began!

Side note: I collect penguins. It started back when I lived in Philly (1997-ish), working in computer repair. I was the traveling network technician, and I had a sticker of Tux the Linux penguin on the back window of my beater of a car. Most people don't know what Linux is, let alone that Tux is the mascot, so people assumed that I just liked penguins. Non-geek friends and even a few of my clients started buying penguin things for me - trinkets, figurines, etc. That is how my collection began.


Penguins in my home office

I have a little penguin figurine that I use as a card capper. He looks like baby Mumble from Happy Feet. Sometimes, people ignore him. Sometimes, he's the center of attention. Last night, it was the latter.

Cutie had some words with the penguin after my suckout hand. The 1 seat inquired as to the eye-pecking abilities of the penguin. There were occasional shouts of "Penguin Power!" from various table-mates whenever I was in a hand. The guy to my left (a regular - the one I sucked out on with 9-8 offsuit last week) borrowed the penguin once, and snagged a runner-runner flush off of a flop with no pair, no draw (unless you count a backdoor flush draw). At one point, I went to the bathroom and let Cutie borrow the penguin while I was gone. When I came back, the table told tales of debauchery and unspeakable things that were done to the penguin in my absence. I was mock-appalled, and the woman to my right performed CPR on my penguin in an attempt to bring him back to life. It worked, and the table rejoiced.

The other source of hilarity came from a phrase that the 1 seat threw out after sucking out on a hand. It went something like, "Even a blind chicken finds corn every once in a while."

WTF?? Blind chicken?? Do chickens even eat corn? I guess they do. But still, WTF???

By the end of the evening, we had blind chickens, deaf penguins, and all manner of senseless barnyard animals finding corn and green chips and who knows what else. We got a lot of mileage out of that one.

Unfortunately, after folding for 3 dealers straight (ie. an hour and a half), I decided that as much fun as my table was, it was time to go. I was up 215 or so, and the midnight hour was near. I bid farewell to my table and wished them well.

I'm sure nobody wanted to see my chips leave the table, but at the same time, the smart few must have realized that I wasn't going to part with them easily.

I had an absolutely great time. I wish I knew people's names to thank them (not that they read this). It was a lot of fun, and one of those rare times when you feel like you've made a table full of friends out of strangers.

And look who has a baby bankroll going!