Hella Hold'em

Donkey dump ('dä[ng]-kE 'd&mp) - an unnecessary shipment of a significant quantity of chips from your stack to your opponent's stack resulting from a gross misplay of a hand such as a bluff, an overplay of an inferior hand, or just plain stupidity on your part often caused by a poker disease called temporary obstinatia.

Yup. My dufus plays of late - complete donkey dumps. Pronunciation above provided by Merriam-Webster Online (my favorite dictionary site ever!) (Only true geeks actually HAVE a favorite dictionary site). Definition and the word "obstinatia" courtesy of ME!

I have about 84 different things in my head to post about today. I just woke up a few minutes ago, and all of this was swimming in my brain, so I immediately headed to the computer. Not that I don't immediately head to the computer on every other day of my life...

First, I woke from my slumber because of a Vegas dream. It was rather nonsensical, so if anybody would like to analyze my dream, you are welcome to. Here's what I remember:

I arrived in Vegas with my Flyers duffel bag over my shoulder. No recollection of the flight - though people keep saying to make sure to sit on the LEFT side of the plane. I'm guessing they mean, the left side as you're walking down the aisle to sit down? I'm walking around a hotel that ends up being Caesar's. (I'm not staying at Caesar's, but I have been TiVo'ing the "Caesars 24/7" show that runs on TV, so I think that's where the setting came from). I can't find the check-in desk. I stop and ask an older woman who is sitting nearby some empty blackjack tables, and she goes on to explain what each floor of the hotel offers (as the elevators were nearby). Eventually I get her to direct me to the check-in desks. On my way to finding them, I run into a guy that tells me to be sure to tell the clerk that I have a large instrument with me, and that I will need a room with a larger bathtub, because those rooms have easier access to the outside doors of the hotel. OK... I find them and walk up. All lines are vacant. I choose the one clerk who is standing ready to help me - he looked a bit like a young Don Johnson. As I'm walking up to the desk, a flashing sign to my right is listing all of the "Race for Bracelets" winners from Full Tilt, and my name is on there. Then I remember - despite losing the one bracelet race tourney I attempted, I had won a free bracelet race entry somehow! (Obviously a dream). Shooot! I forgot to book my flight earlier, so I missed the $1500NL WSOP game! I figure, oh well... I fumble through my wallet looking for something to show the clerk to prove my reservation, and he says, "Just give me your driver's license." OK... I tell him I've got a large guitar with me so I need a room with a large bathtub. He obliges. (I don't play guitar, though I used to play bass when I was 19... sold it when I couldn't afford the rent on my apartment one month). Then the dream got all whacky. I'm riding a four-wheeler through a subdivision construction site with an old high school friend (Brooke) in the back seat (I know, four wheelers don't have back seats). We get through all the dirt and mud and back on to pavement, and there are pipes coming out of the road, kind of like submarine eyes out of water. I couldn't figure out if they were spies, or ventilation for the people that lived under the street. Then I decided to go play poker (back in Vegas). And I woke up thinking about donkey dumps (as described above - not as in, feces of a jackass).

As I laid in bed after waking up from that dream, I was thinking about April's post of miscellany. I couldn't think of a single thing to post about myself, though it's a great idea to list a bunch of things like that to serve as conversation pieces. I'm going to try to come up with some random tidbits right now. Forgive me if I borrow inspiration from April.

For conversation starters:

• I play the flute, and was in band (marching and symphonic) from 4th grade through 12th. (Yes, I have band camp stories).


• I have 4 tattoos and 7 piercings (6 in my ears, one in my nose).


• I hate my current haircut and really need to get it fixed.


• I spent 8 years in the Catholic school system. (Yes, we had uniforms).


• I've never puked from drinking... ever. I hate throwing up.


• I have an unexplained fear of getting my nose broken. Terrified of it, really.


• I'm afraid of fire.


• I'm an awful automobile passenger. I try not to be a backseat driver, but am deathly afraid of being in a car wreck when other people are driving. I think I died in a fiery car wreck in a past life.


• I read tarot cards and am into astrology, particularly natal charts (birth charts) and compatibility.


• My cats are named Maverick, Goose, and Merlin (name that movie).


• My parents never divorced - they were happily married for over 25 years before my dad died in 2000 after a 2 year fight with leukemia. He was 46. (I was 25).


• I have a little brother, Eric, who is 27. He plays poker too.


• My first poker book was Hellmuth's "Play Poker Like the Pros."


• I got my first computer when I was 9 years old. It was a Commodore Vic 20. Then, I got a Commodore 64. I bought my first IBM-compatible box when I was 16 - it was Packard Bell 386, 25MHz CPU.


• I teach web programming and computer repair at a local community college as my "day job," and do contract web development work on the side.


• I have no artistic skills whatsoever - I can't draw, can't paint, can't even make cool computer art.I hire my graphic designer friend Dusty to do that stuff for me.


• I've been building my own computers for the last 9 years.


• I have a tendency to root for the underdog.


• I'm a Libra.


• AMD CPU's rule the world, in my humble opinion.


• I absolutely love the sport of ice hockey, and am passionately in love with the Philadelphia Flyers. I adopted them during the 4 years I lived in Philly after college.


• I now live in the burbs of Chicago, near where I grew up.


• My favorite band is Dave Matthews Band, though I'm a newbie to them. This is the third summer I will spend following them to all of their local shows with Randy. We've got 5 shows set up this summer (Noblesville, IN, Alpine Valley, WI, and Chicago). I've seen DMB ten times so far (eleven by the time I get to Vegas - the Chicago show is coming up this Thursday, the night before I take flight for Sin City).


• Former musical loves include Anthrax, Megadeth, Slayer, Skid Row, Poison, Guns n' Roses, Bon Jovi, Faith No More, R.E.M., Nirvana, Tori Amos, the Pixies, Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson.... etc.


• Kevin Smith is my overlord.

OK, that's all I can think of. Should be plenty of fodder there for conversational use, or for supplementing the tabloids when I upset the WPBT Aladdin Classic and take it down!

I suppose I should write a little bit about poker, since this IS a poker blog, eh? Last night, down to my last $32 in Full Tilt Poker, I dropped down from my usual $20+2 SnG's to try and grind out a slow bankroll build. Managed to increase my bankroll by over 30% - yup, I made ten bucks last night. Busted out of a $5+.50 SnG, placed 2nd in another, and made up the rest of the profit with a small win on a $25NL table (though I bought in as a small stack, something I'm not accustomed to doing).

That's it for me! I'm off work today and tomorrow, and have no real agenda for the two days. I need to do some shopping for Vegas, though I really dislike shopping. (Yes, I'm a woman who just said she doesn't like to shop). Randy is way more into shopping than I am - too bad I can't just have him go try on clothes for me and bring me back some. Though considering my wardrobe is similar to his, he almost could....

Alrighty, I'm starving. Time to get this day started!